BY EMILY BROWN
TRIGGER WARNING: mention of eating disorders throughout, but every effort has been made to ensure that no harmful behaviour associated with eating disorders is discussed explicitly in this article.
According to the Anorexia and Bulimia Care website, “young people, aged 14 to 25 are most at risk” from eating disorders. With the average student being in this age demographic, it’s unsurprising that eating disorders affect many university students. Something that did surprise me, however, was how many students I would meet through the University of Plymouth Pole Dancing Club (UPPDC) who have experienced an eating disorder.
Pole dancing is a sport which intimidates many, often due to its connections with the sex industry and the ‘revealing’ outfits that are worn. Being raised entirely within Catholic education, the taboo which surrounded pole dancing intrigued me and led me to join UPPDC in September 2018. During my induction class, I didn’t fully believe my instructor when she told me that soon I would be dancing in tiny shorts and a sports bra, as opposed to cycle shorts and a vest top. As someone without an eating disorder, but whose teenage body was scrutinised by the modelling industry I worked in for three years, I soon realised that pole dancing can require you to show the parts of your body that you are most ashamed of. This transformed my thighs from ‘too big for high fashion runway’ into a body part that helps me grip to the pole and make beautiful shapes. This enabled me to do things I never imagined I would do in my induction class, such as competing in a regional competition, taking a stripper-style classes, and participating in Plymouth Marrow’s naked calendar, no longer obsessively concerned about the size of my legs. Pole dancing taught me to love my body for the way it was built.
Although there is still a preconception that you have to have the ‘perfect’ body to be a pole dancer, it’s refreshing to see UPPDC at Freshers Fair events with the pole set up, allowing pole dancers of all sizes to showcase their skills to potential new members. Perhaps this is what attracts women affected by eating disorders to pole; we are a club which uses an exposed body to create art.
Animal Behaviour and Welfare student, Lauren McBrearty, initially joined UPPDC as a coping mechanism for grief and to keep active, but it quickly gave her a ‘huge confidence boost’ too. Lauren struggled with an eating disorder when she was 14, as a result of bullying. She says that: ‘body image issues have affected my confidence because I felt like couldn’t wear certain clothes and dress a certain way [but] pole dancing has made me feel stronger and proud of my body.’
Another member of UPPDC, Bella, had bulimic tendencies and struggled with disordered eating from 2014. Bella has been pole dancing for two years and now sees her body ‘as part of the art of a dance.’ Although she described herself as ‘recovered’ before joining UPPDC, pole enabled her to become ‘more confident and accepting of [her] body.’ She says that ‘pole dancing is like nothing else and recovery is so incredibly worth it.’
During my two years pole dancing, I have had the pleasure of seeing first-hand how pole dance challenges the way women, like Lauren and Bella, look at their bodies. Everyone in a pole class at The Art of Dance has different body shapes and fitness goals. The body diversity in classes positively challenges the way many students view their own bodies, including Psychology student, and UPPDC Team Captain, Nicole. She shared how: ‘pole dancing made me want to be strong rather than skinny. It helped me value my body in terms of what it can do rather than what it weighs. Suddenly, I wanted muscles and strength rather than to see bones. In addition, seeing a variety of body types in the studio really helped me normalise things like cellulite and stretch marks.’
Nicole was diagnosed with an eating disorder in 2015 and spent a year in a psychiatric hospital. She now describes herself as ‘better and, for the first time in years, not underweight,’ crediting pole dance as a part of her recovery as it gave her a ‘focus outside of losing weight and introduced [her] to a group of extremely supportive, kind, understanding, and strong women.’
Similarly, Natasha, who struggled with anorexia from a young age, says: ‘I finally feel like I’m at a stage in my recovery where I’m finally understanding that fighting [anorexia] is what I need to do every day. Pole dancing has made me recognise the strength my body has. It’s different from other dancing I’ve done in the past, like ballet, where the focus can be body type based. I feel the inclusivity of pole has really given me a boost in my recovery. Pole dancing makes me feel empowered as a woman, and stronger and more empowered in myself as well as in my body. I have learnt that it’s only my perception of myself that is concerning… nobody else in the [pole] community is worried about my body shape like me!’
Of course, pole dancing does not magically cure people of eating disorders, ‘since EDs never truly go away’ says Hannah, a Geography student. Hannah was formally diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa around the age of 16 or 17 but is at the point of recovery where she has ‘gained weight and [is] no longer tormented by [her] irrational perceptions of food and weight.’ She still has ‘diagnosed body dysmorphic disorder (BDD)’ but says that: ‘pole has improved the way I see myself and has pushed me to overcome some of my worst symptoms of BDD. At my lowest points with BDD, I could not face seeing myself and my skin and so I lived with my mirrors covered, my rooms dark, and had to close my eyes when I changed so I didn’t have to view myself.” But now she is confident enough to ‘rock a performance in a sports bra and pole shorts – I truly never thought I would be able to view my body, let alone showcase my skin to an audience.’
This article is not suggesting that everyone who has or is currently suffering with an eating disorder should pole dance. However, I do think that anyone who wants to learn to love every inch of their body, including the ‘ugly’ bits that society tells you to dislike such as cellulite, stretch marks, scars, or body fat, should consider taking up the sport. Every woman interviewed for this article has described how pole dancing helps them to feel strong, confident, and beautiful. These are perceptions that everybody should have of themselves, no matter what size, shape, or weight their body is.
If there is anything in this article that has affected you please visit the below links for more information:
Beat Eating Disorders: www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk
Univerity of Plymouth Student well-being Services: www.plymouth.ac.uk/student-life/services/student-services/shine/eating-issues
NHS information about eating disorders: www.nhs.uk/conditions/eating-disorders/
If you think you have an undiagnosed eating disorder, please speak to your GP, or the University Well-Being Centre. You can also call Beat’s adult helpline (0808 801 0677) or youth helpline (0808 801 0711).
The photos in this article were used with permission from Lauren McBrearty and Nicole Stockel.